The Day the Castle Got VERY Screwed Up
by ShortyJill
Summary: A story that a friend and I wrote (dun gimme all da credit, onegai!) last year that we got in trouble with the principal with because of the language ^^;;;; So sadly it had to be edited and that's the way it was typed.


::Somewhere dark, damp, and cold, Saph is hatching up a plan to dump Anubis::  
  
::Lori walks in the room where Saph is mumbling:: Um, Saph? Yoo-hoo, earth to Saph... Hey! Snap out of it!  
  
Saph: What? Oh, hi. It's you. I didn't expect any visitors today.  
  
Lori: Well I usually drop in on people unexpectedly. What were you mumbling about?  
  
Saph: I'm trying to find a way to dump my current boyfriend without hurting his feelings. Can you help me in any way?  
  
Lori: Um, why would you want to dump him? What did he ever do to you?  
  
Saph: Nothing really. But last time him I were out of the castle, I stumbled upon him hitting on that onna, Mia.  
  
Lori: Ouch. Maybe you want to hurt his feelings.  
  
Saph: Yeah, I do. Besides, I'm kinda cheating on him, too. I have another person I'm in love with.  
  
Lori: ::raises eyebrows:: Uh-huh... Do I want to know who? Or do I care?  
  
Saph: You should. You're a friend. His name's Chichiri.  
  
Lori: ::relieved sweatdrop:: Good. Now who's that? A pokemon? Oh, sorry. That's ... um ... some name actually. As for advice, just go up to Mister Cheat-man and tell him what you saw. Then dump him. Today. Now.  
  
Saph: Chichiri is one of the Suzaku 7. But you're right. I should talk to him.  
  
Lori: Today. Now. ::grabs Saph by the arm:: Like I said....  
  
Saph: But wait! ::gets dragged down the dark halls by Lori's grip::  
  
Lori: Wait? Why?  
  
Saph: I don't know if I can go through this. I don't know if he can take that kind of pressure.  
  
Lori: He is a warlord, right? So yeah, he should be able to take it.  
  
Saph: Good point. Let's go. ::takes Lori's wrist, and drags her along:: You're coming with me!  
  
Lori: Ungh.  
  
::About 5 minutes of dark halls later::  
  
Saph: Anubis? Ya there? ::knocks a couple'a times:: Anubis!? ::opens door to find Anubis and Mia making out::  
  
Lori: AAAGGHH!! ANUBIS!  
  
Saph: How dare you!?  
  
Anubis: I.- I can explain!  
  
Saph: No! Oh, by the way, talk to me when you get the CHANCE! ::slams door in his face and runs off to chamber::  
  
Lori: ::Lori is still standing there. She starts yelling at Anubis through the door:: You baka! ::opens the door:: You weakling!!!  
  
Anubis: What's with you lately?  
  
Lori: How so?  
  
Anubis: Well that for one thing.  
  
Lori: Well you deserve it... Treating Saph that way!  
  
Anubis: I know I'm cheating. Now go away!  
  
Lori: WHAAAT!! Hmmm... ::stalks off to find Sekhmet. She returns half an hour later dragging Sekh along with her. She opens the door to find Anubis and Mia still making out::  
  
Anubis: What is he doin' bargin' in on us!? This is your doing, Lori!  
  
Lori: Well, Sekh, I explained it all to you. Now what do you think???  
  
Sekh: Um... Well... ::takes a deep breath:: ANUBIS what the HECK do you think you're DOING???  
  
Anubis: Makin' out. What else, dummy?  
  
Sekh: How dare you call me that! This means WAR!!!  
  
Anubis: When I'm done! Can't you see I'm in the middle of doin' somfin'!?  
  
Lori: Yeah, for an hour at least! C'mon Mia, let's go have a little talk... Leave those two to fate... You only know what's gonna happen.  
  
::somewhere in the depths of Saph's chamber::  
  
Saph: Yeah... Sure. How about that really, really, fancy on the corner of 54th and Main tomorrow at 6:00pm? ::Anubis walks in on her conversation on the phone:: Kay. See ya at 6. Bye! ::hangs up phone::  
  
Anubis: Who was that?  
  
Saph: Oh. It's you. What are you doing here?  
  
Anubis: I just wanted to say I'm sorry.  
  
Saph: Well, don't be. I have a date tomorrow at 6. ::Anubis stares at Saph with his jaw dropped::  
  
Anubis: What do you mean by that?  
  
Saph: I'm saying that I'm breaking up with you.  
  
Anubis: ::glares at Saph with astonishment:: So am I being dumped for another guy?  
  
Saph: Technically ....yes. We can still be close friends, though. That okay?  
  
Anubis: Yeah. I'll be going now then... See ya.  
  
Saph: See ya!  
  
Anubis: ::turns around and shuts the door behind him. When he gets far enough away from the door he get an evil glare in his eyes:: Good! Now back to Mia. Mia!? Where are you!? ::runs down the hall until he literally runs into Lori::  
  
Lori: Where are you going?  
  
Anubis: Uh ... to find Mia ... why?  
  
Lori: I was just talking to her. She says that she won't see you anymore. She doesn't want to be a girlfriend to a cheater. ::retreats down the hall:: Cheater! Cheater!  
  
Anubis: Now what am I going to do? Mia left me, Saph dumped me ... ::gasps and puts on an evil grin:: Kayura ...hehehe....  
  
Lori: I heard that! ::disappears::  
  
Anubis: Grrrrr... I'll get you for that! ::runs off to find Kayura::  
  
Lori: Not if I find her first! ::runs off to Kayura's chamber:: Kayura...?  
  
Kayura: ::calls from the darkness:: What?  
  
Lori: Anubis is acting really weird lately. Saph dumped him cause he was cheating on her ... get this, with Mia. So stay away from him.  
  
Kayura: Uh ...okay...  
  
Anubis: ::barges into her chamber:: Hey Kay-babe! What'cha been doin' lately?  
  
Kayura: AAAGGH! Lori you were right! Let's get out of here!  
  
Anubis: What? Did I say something wrong?  
  
Lori: WHAT have you been EATING???  
  
::Kayura flees::  
  
Anubis: Kay-babe! Wait up for your Anubis-kun! ::runs out of the chamber and follows Kayura closely behind::  
  
Lori: Demon Power Draw! ::Anubis collapses as Kayura keeps running:: I asked you a question. Have you been into my chemicals???  
  
Anubis: ::looks up and sees 3 Loris:: Uh ...kinda...  
  
Lori: What do you mean by "kinda"? This could be major! Half of those chemicals are poisonous!  
  
Anubis: Actually I was experimenting with a few chemicals when I saw something in a glass that said, "Do Not Drink, Not Yet Approved".  
  
Lori: ::shakes her head:: Oh, no... That was a kind of cure for a certain poison, but it has a high amount of hallucinogenic chemicals. I'm trying to reduce the amount.  
  
Anubis: Thanks for telling me after I drink it. It really helps. Well, gotta go find Kay-babe! See ya! ::runs off:: Kay-babe! Kay-babe! Where'dya go, Kay-babe!?  
  
Lori: Demon Power Draw! ::Anubis collapses again:: I didn't tell you to drink it in the first place.  
  
Anubis: How was I supposed to know that I wasn't supposed to drink it!? I didn't say that you couldn't drink it!?  
  
Lori: Well, it said you weren't supposed to.  
  
Anubis: It didn't say, "Do Not Drink, Highly Hallucinogenic"!  
  
Lori: No, it said, "Do Not Drink, Not Yet Approved". So there!  
  
Anubis: Oh well. I'm off to find Kay-babe. See ya! ::zips off into darkness::  
  
Lori: You get back here!!!! ::orbs in front of him:: Supersonic Truth Wave! ::Anubis collapses unconscious:: Now where did he put that ...hmmm..... ::digs under a couch:: AHA! ::aims Chi Lin Tou at Anubis. Energy strands spin out around him:: Hehehe....  
  
:: In Saph's chamber, we find Saph and Kayura having a discussion about Anubis's strange behavior::  
  
Kayura: He's searching for me! Do you have a place where I can hide?  
  
Saph: I already told you, no. Besides, I have a date tonight at 6. What time is it?  
  
Kayura: 4:30. Why?  
  
Saph: Dang! I'm not even half finished getting ready and I only have an hour and a half left to finish!  
  
Kayura: Can I help you?  
  
Saph: That'll work.  
  
::elsewhere::  
  
Anubis: What the heck... What are these? ::plucks at energy strands::  
  
Lori: ::laughs:: Until that stuff wears off...  
  
::elsewhere::  
  
Sekh: ::runs into room where he finds Dais:: What's black and white and blue and black and white and black and white?  
  
Dais: Um....  
  
Sekh: Lori using your Chi Lin thingy against Anubis!  
  
Dais: I AM GOING TO KILL HER!!!! ::storms off::  
  
::elsewhere:: (I know. We couldn't think of any other word for it... hehe...)  
  
Saph: Kayura? Could you-- ::Ding Dong!:: Shoot! Kayura! Could you get that?  
  
Kayura: Sure. ::she reaches for the doorknob, but it turns and opens. It's Chichiri::  
  
Chichiri: I'm here for Saph? She here?  
  
Kayura: Yeah. She should be out in a sec... SAPH! Ya almost done?!  
  
Saph: Yeah. ::runs out of the bathroom with her hair all pulled up:: So? You like?  
  
Chichiri: ::Chi just stares at Saph then comes back to reality:: What? Oh yeah! You look beautiful this evening. May I walk you to the car?  
  
Saph: Absolutely! ::continues conversation with Chi until they get in the car::  
  
Kayura: ::Kayura is dumbfounded. She waves as they drive away, leaving her. She shuts the door and decides to stay in Saph's chamber:: Where the heck did she find such a good lookin' guy?!  
  
::In another place::  
  
Dais: ::walks in:: LORI!!!  
  
Lori: Uh... I can explain... ::goes on to tell the whole story from the beginning to the end. Soon, she finishes:: So that's why I had to use your weapon thingy.  
  
Dais: ::sighs:: Couldn't you have used some rope? Give me that thing. You could poke your eye out. ::walks away::  
  
Lori: ::starts to giggle:: You know, I'll bet he didn't even realize what he said.  
  
Anubis: Lori!! Can you untie me now!?  
  
Lori: Not until I make sure that stuff has worn off.  
  
Anubis: But it is! I'm my almost normal self again See? ::rips out some of his hair with his mouth:: See? I told ya. ::spits out hair:: Yucgh!!  
  
Lori: ::stifles a laugh:: Okay, then, let me see... What do you think of when you think "Kayura"?  
  
Anubis: Mega hot babe with hair that shines like the ocean.... ::sighs::  
  
Lori: Uh-uh. You're stayin' right there, buster  
  
Anubis: ::sighs:: Oh well. I tried.  
  
::elsewhere::  
  
Dais: Quit bugging me, Sekhmet! You know I'm not going to ask her to go out.  
  
Sekh: C'mon! You know you like her!  
  
Dais: ::blushes:: Not that much.  
  
Sekh: Oh. Yeah right. Remember your first encounter? It was love at first sight and you know it!  
  
Dais: NO IT WASN'T!! She didn't even know me and I barely knew her! Anyway, she's what, nineteen and I'm, 551, I think. LOOK AT ME! I'm losing my MEMORY!!  
  
Sekh: How could you have barely known her? And you are not losing your memory. You're only 25.  
  
Dais: ::sweatdrop:: Do I need an excuse for everything? So I barely knew her. I saw her mabey twice before. ::Looks at Sekhmet curiously:: When are you gonna get a girlfriend?  
  
Sekh: Uh ...well...I... None of your business, Dais!  
  
Dais: Yeah. We're all to old.  
  
Sekh: No... It's not that! I just don't want to talk about my lovelife!  
  
Dais: Oooo so you do have a girlfriend! So that's what you do when we can't find you for hours on end. I'm glad I'm not tied down like that.  
  
Sekh: Okay, fine! You have me! Her name is... ::whispers in Dais's ear:: There! Ya happy!?  
  
Dais: Mmm... No.  
  
Sekh: Why not?  
  
Dais: You have to say it out loud.  
  
Sekh: Fine! Her name is Zoe! Now ya happy!?  
  
Dais: ::eye goes wide:: I know her. Now I remember why I'm glad I don't have a girlfriend.  
  
Sekh: What's wrong with Zoe!? She's nice, pretty, young, pretty, blonde, pretty.... Why don't you like her!?  
  
Dais: She's too pretty. Not like other people I know.  
  
Sekh: So!?  
  
Dais: Um, how did we get off topic? Oh, I should have kept my mouth shut.  
  
Sekh: We were talking about your girlfriend.  
  
Dais: She's NOT my GIRLFRIEND.  
  
Sekh: So why do you talk about her like she is?  
  
Dais: Like how?  
  
Sekh: Couple'a weeks back I was up around 1am. I walked past your chamber and I heard you talking in your sleep about her. It was funny. I even got it on tape! ::holds up tape recorder and presses play::  
  
Dais: ::hears static and a loud whistling:: You mean you got Anubis snoring ::holds up tape:: I believe this is the one... ::stomps on it and rips up the tape and throws it out the window:: Believe it or not, that was Cale. If you remember, that was his bed collapsed. I was in the living room.  
  
Sekh: Oopsies! My mistake! Cale's gonna kill me! Gotta go!  
  
Dais: Not until we finish here.  
  
Sekh: What'dya mean?  
  
Dais: Hello ....discussion...?  
  
Sekh: Oh. Well this is the end. See ya! ::zips outta the picture with Dais just standing there::  
  
Dais: No. It's NOT. This isn't a picture. ::reaches over and grabs Sekhmet:: This is a story. Now are we going to finish this and satisfy our readers or not? Let me rephrase that: We ARE going to.  
  
Sekh: NOOO! I seriously have to go! I have a dentist appointment in like 20 seconds!  
  
Dais: You don't need a dentist. You have 19-year-old-teeth and have never had a cavity in your life. If you must go... ::yells offstage:: Hey! Setra! Ya mind stoppin' time for us! ::squeaky noise:: There. Now FINISH. We have a script here. ::waves paper under Sekh's nose::  
  
Sekh: Uh... I JUST WANNA QUIT!!! MOMMY!!  
  
Dais: She's dead. Ya killed her, remember? And you can't quit. ::yells offstage:: Setra, ya MIND!! ::Sekhmet blinks and becomes normal self::  
  
Sekh: DADDY!! Oh wait ...he's dead too! Shoot! ::lightbulb pops up over his head:: KAYURA!!  
  
::somewhere deep in the castle Kayura hears a faint voice, "Kayura!"::  
  
Kayura: Oh dear. Who needs me now? ::she runs towards the voice::  
  
Sekh: KAYURA!! ::Kayura skids to a stop in front of him::  
  
Kayura: I heard you the first time. What's going on?  
  
Sekh: Dais wants me to finish the conversation but I have dentist appointment. He doesn't believe me.  
  
Dais: I STOPPED TIME!!! What else do you want!?  
  
Sekh: To get outta this argument!  
  
Dais: Take a look at the script. YOU are supposed to convince ME to do THIS. ::points at script. Kayura leans over and starts laughing::  
  
Sekh: Oh yeah ...hehe... How did we forget?  
  
Dais: ::sweatdrop:: My fault.... Let's start again.  
  
Sekh: Okay. Why don't you just ASK her? I'm sure she won't mind.  
  
Dais: Take a look at the script. ::Sekh leans over:: It's called convincing.  
  
Sekh: Sorry. I don't convince. I poison.  
  
Dais: ::small voice:: That works... ::zips out of the room:: Okay... I'll go... I'll go!  
  
Sekh: Good! Back to my dentist appointment. SETRA! ::time starts again and Sekh leaves::  
  
Dais: ::pokes his head in the room:: Is he gone?  
  
Kayura: Uh-huh.  
  
Dais: Good! Now I won't have to ask her!  
  
Kayura: Yes, you do.  
  
Dais: ::screech:: WHAAAT!!  
  
Kayura: You like her right? Do you want her to like you?  
  
Dais: Uh...  
  
Kayura: C'mon! It'll be fun! I'll help you!  
  
Dais: Uh...  
  
Kayura: Is that all you can say?  
  
Dais: Well!!??  
  
Kayura: Well what!? Oh. What's wrong with helping a fellow warlord who's in love?  
  
Dais: ::glare:: Nothing. I'm submitting myself to fate.  
  
Kayura: Don't. It's now or never. Talpa, or Lori. Take your pick.  
  
Dais: I think you know. Let's go already.  
  
Kayura: Okay! ::grabs Dais's wrist and pulls him down many dark hallways::  
  
::in another place::  
  
Saph: Well, Chi, I had a great time. Maybe we can go to a movie or something next week. How does that sound?  
  
Chichiri: What's a movie?  
  
Saph: Oh, right. I forgot. Well, you'll see next week. When are you free?  
  
Chichiri: Monday I have a play, Tuesday we sommon Suzaku, Wednesday I have a meeting with "Our Highness", Thursday I have a magic show, Friday I'll be powering my staff ...uh... Saturday! Free! Kay?  
  
Saph: Sure! What time?  
  
Chichiri: 8:00pm sharp!  
  
Saph: Kay, see ya then!  
  
::with Anubis::  
  
::Lori shoves a liquid down his throat::  
  
Anubis: Bleacgh! What WAS that stuff!? Iya na!  
  
Lori: Antidote. ::watches clock:: Okay. All set. ::unties him:: You're free to go.  
  
Anubis: Arigato. I needed that. NOW will you untie me? Kudasai?  
  
Lori: Duuuh... I did.  
  
Anubis: Oh. ::looks down:: Okay. Thanks.  
  
Lori: Sure. Now go on and do whatever it is you do when we can never find you.  
  
Anubis: I'm gonna go find Kay-babe. Tell her I'm sorry.  
  
Lori: ::sighs:: That antidote still has to reach the back of your brain.  
  
Anubis: Kay. See ya in a bit, hopefully. ::Anubis zips off into the darkness to find Kayura::  
  
Lori: ::sighs again:: God... What is with these warlords lately....?  
  
::with Kayura::  
  
Anubis: KAYURA!!??  
  
Kayura: What!? I'm helping Dais doing something!  
  
Anubis: I just-- woah! What happend Dais, my man?!  
  
Dais: ::tries to shrink into the shadows:: Nothing...  
  
Anubis: No! I was gonna say you look great!  
  
Dais: Really. Well there's no mirrors around here so...  
  
Anubis: C'mon! Ya gotta see yourself! ::grabs Dais's wrist and drags him to a chamber with a mirror::  
  
Dais: Ouch... Kayura WHAT did you DO!!??  
  
Kayura: I made you look spiffy. Don't you like it? I love it!  
  
Anubis: You look good. Admit it.  
  
::Authors' note: All you readers out there are probably wondering what Kayura did to make Dais look "spiffy", ne? Well, this is what she did: Kayura put him in a tux, cut his hair shoulder length, and made him look like some love-sick puppy who's going to ask a girl out. Now back to the action!::  
  
Dais: No I'm NOT going to admit it because I DON'T look good. ::runs out of the room and comes back 15 minutes later looking like his normal self-- well exept for his hair. He backs away from Kayura when he sees the look on her face:: Oh no you don't. I'm not trusting you anymore.  
  
Kayura: Pllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeeee?? ????????????  
  
Dais: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo.  
  
Kayura: But that's how I would want my guy to look like if he was asking me out, though.  
  
Dais: Yeah, well, OBVIOUSLY you are nothing like Lori.  
  
Kayura: Sorry. What kind of stuff does she like then?  
  
Dais: She accepts people for who they are. UNLIKE you.  
  
Kayura: Oh. Well, then, what are you going to do with your hair? ::tousles it around:: Lori hasn't seen it yet....  
  
Dais: YOU screwed it up, YOU explain it.  
  
Anubis: Let's go Dais, I'll explain. ::Anubis, again, grabs Dais, this time by the hair for fun and drags him down the dark halls to find Lori::  
  
::with Lori::  
  
Saph: ::Authors' note: She's talking about her date:: Oh, it was great! We had the most wonderful conversation--::just then, Anubis and Dais walk in:: Oh, hello Anubis, DAIS!!?? What happend??  
  
Lori: We can see what happened but how and why??  
  
Anubis: Kayura wanted to spiff up Dais here for Lori.  
  
Lori: Um ...dare I ask why??  
  
Anubis: Because he was thinking of asking you out. ::looks at Lori::  
  
Lori: You think he could say himself? He's not two years old, you know, Anubis.  
  
Dais: Hehe... ::tries to shrink backwards out the door::  
  
Anubis: NO YOU DON'T! YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE UNTIL YOU ASK!  
  
Dais: Heh...  
  
Lori: ::taps foot:: YOU are just making things WORSE... GO AWAY Anubis. Kay? Just GO AWAY.  
  
Anubis: Okay. C'mon Saph. I need a talk with ya.\  
  
Saph: I'm not going anywhere! I wanna see what happens ....hehe.... ::conjures popcorn::  
  
Lori: Yeah you go away too. Sorry but this ain't a movie....  
  
Saph: Fine. Now Anubis about that talk... ::leaves chamber::  
  
Anubis: That tone of voice.... Do you think I'll get her back?  
  
Lori: Fat chance. ::yells:: YOU ALREADY HAVE A BOYFRIEND, SAPH.  
  
::Anubis shrieks and runs out of the room::  
  
Saph: ANUBIS!?  
  
Anubis: Yes mam! Coming! ::runs down the halls::  
  
Dais: Er....  
  
::Lori bends down over her work on the table::  
  
Dais: Doyouwanttogoouttomorrownight?  
  
Lori: Mmmhmmm ...sure. ::looks up:: That place on the river maybe? For dinner?  
  
Dais: Okay ...sure... ::backs out the door, turns, and flees::  
  
Lori: ::laughs:: You'd never think he'd be so shy.  
  
::Kayura and Saph's heads pop in through the doorjamb::  
  
Kayura & Saph: So. How'd it go? We heard him ask you out.  
  
Lori: Well, if you were eavesdropping then you know don't you?  
  
Saph: ::mocking Dais:: Well,Idon'tknowaboutyou,butIcouldn'tunderstandawordheaskedyou.  
  
Kayura: Yeah!  
  
Lori: Hmmm... Why do you care?  
  
Kayura: Because we wanna know. Right, Saph?  
  
Saph: Na-- oh yeah! Yeah, we do!  
  
Lori: Alright. All he did was ask if I wanted to go to dinner tomorrow.  
  
Kayura: Oh.  
  
Saph: Okay. Thanks. ::looks at watch:: Dang! I promised Chi I'd call about the movie! Gotta go! ::runs outta chamber::  
  
Sekh: ::walks in:: Well?? Is it true?? Did I succeed in my mission??  
  
Lori: ::sighs:: Yes, Sekhmet. So it was you who persuaded him. I suspected as much.  
  
Kayura: ::looks back and forth between Lori and Sekhmet with a puzzled look on her face. Finally, she looks at her watch:: Hehe... Must be going. Gotta find Anubis... ::Authors' note: She's got her hand behind her head. Hopefully, ya know what type of pose I'm talking about::  
  
Lori: Kayura!!! YOU are going NOWHERE until you explain.  
  
Kayura: Explain what? Me and Anubis?  
  
Lori: That AND why you are posing like that.  
  
Kayura: Well ...you see, Anubis and I are having a nice get-together to get to know each other better and the pose I got from a very good friend, DUO! ::giggles::  
  
Lori: Heh... Now Sekhmet.... Could you have spared him the embarrassment?  
  
Sekh: Nooo...  
  
Lori: And whyyy not?  
  
Sekh: Becaaauuusee... It's fuuun to torment Daaaiiss....  
  
Lori: You... You... ::jumps on him and starts to pound him::  
  
Sekh: AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! Get offa me! Can't you control your hormones!?  
  
Lori: Can't you tell I'm beating on you?! ::wallops him in the eye, bloodies his nose, then grips his hair and bangs his head on the floor::  
  
Sekh: I surrender! I surrender! ::waves white flag:: I won't torment him anytime after the date! Okay?  
  
Lori: ::smacks him across the face:: Fine. ::rolls off of him and stands up:: But if I hear of anything... I don't care if HE wallops you before I hear it... ANYTHING AT ALL... ::shows him fist::  
  
Sekh: ::shrinks back towards the door:: Eep!  
  
::Lori jumps at him. Sekh dodges and runs out the door. Lori sighs. She then goes back to her room and goes through the secret passage that goes to the lab::  
  
::Yet another Authors' note: Anubis is running down the halls to find Kayura. Kayura is running down the halls to find Anubis. Soon they literallly run into each other::  
  
Kayura: There you are!  
  
Anubis: There you are! I've been looking for you all over the castle!  
  
Kayura: Um, I forget. Why?  
  
Anubis: Because we had our get-together? Remember?  
  
Kayura: No... Oh, right.. ::puts arm around his shoulders:: Soo... Anubis... ::they run into Dais::  
  
Anubis: What are you doing here, dang it!? This was supposed to be a private meeting!  
  
Dais: Hide me... Sekhmet is coming after me with his weapon...  
  
Anubis: Baby....  
  
Dais: Obviously, you haven't fought Sekhmet when he is in his armor and you lost your armor orb.  
  
Anubis: Heh... Forgot that. Oh well. Let's go find a quiet chamber, Kayura.  
  
::Dais gallops down the hall to his chamber::  
  
Cale: ::barges in:: Dais! I need your-- Woah! What happened!?  
  
Dais: ::grits his teeth:: Go... Ask... Someone... Else...  
  
Cale: Fine! Be that way! Don't let me tell you that Sekh is on the rampage! ::storms out of chamber::  
  
Dais: I ALREADY KNEW THAT!!! Alright, alright. I'll tell you.  
  
Cale: ::comes back in:: Oh, like the hair...  
  
Dais: Kayura cut it.  
  
Cale: Maybe I'll ask her to cut my hair... Oh! Well, anyway, what were you going to tell me?  
  
Dais: Didn't you want to know what happened?  
  
Cale: Hai! Yes! Tell, tell, tell!  
  
::goes on mute as Dais tells him::  
  
::later, same chamber::  
  
Dais: ::finishes story:: And that's what happened.  
  
Cale: Huh? Could you repeat that?  
  
::goes on mute again as Dais repeat everything, but this time Cale can hear, and no one else can::  
  
Cale: Oooh. I see now... Okay!  
  
Dais: Oh, and did I tell you what Sekhmet made me do.....? ::sound goes off again::  
  
Cale: No. Nani?  
  
::Dais tells him with sound off so only Cale can hear::  
  
Cale: Oooo! Harshness!  
  
::Dais fumes, then grabs Chi Lin Tou::  
  
Cale: Eep! Now what are you going to do?  
  
::Dais aims at Cale::  
  
Cale: AAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! ::ducks because he doesn't have his no-datchi::  
  
Dais: ::aims lower:: Now shut up about it.  
  
Cale: Eep! Yes sir!  
  
Dais: Now help me find my armor orb. I have to fight Sekhmet.  
  
Cale: Kay. ::helps Dais tear up chamber to find orb:: Eureka! Here it is! I found it between your sheets! ::holds up magenta orb::  
  
Dais: What the heck... Oh well... Warlord to Arms!  
  
Cale: Oooo! Never seen him transform before! ::watches Dais in amazement::  
  
Dais: What? What??  
  
Cale: Huh? I just like your transformation!  
  
Dais: Why do you like it so much??  
  
Cale: Cause. You have prettier colors in your transformation . Me? I just have brown, black, red, and yellow. But you have a variety!  
  
Dais: So? You have a variety too.  
  
Cale: Not as pretty as yours though.  
  
Dais: What's so pretty about it?  
  
Cale: They're better than mine, watch. ::pulls out little brown orb:: Warlord to Arms! ::does transformation with his colors::  
  
Dais: Mmmhmm. I agree. But my flying wallpaper has little spiders all over it You wouldn't like that, would you?  
  
Cale: No. But did ya see? Mine had little jackal pups!  
  
Dais: Well... ::walks out:: Sekhmet! Where are you!?  
  
::Lori runs by followed by Kayura, Saph, and Anubis::  
  
Cale: What the--? Oh well! ::runs out following Lori, Kayura, Saph and Anubis:: Ya comin' Dais?  
  
Dais: I think they're running away, not to. ::there's a loud crash from other direction:: Told you. ::heads down the other way::  
  
Cale: AGH! This stupid armor! ::changes back to subarmor:: Hey! Ya guys! Where ya running to?  
  
Anubis, Kayura, Lori, & Saph: AWAY from SEKHMET!!  
  
Cale: Ooohh. I see. ::looks down hall::  
  
Kayura: AAAGGHH!! Here he comes! Run! ::all run away::  
  
Dais: Web of Deception! ::Sekh is caught in the web::  
  
Kayura: Thank you!  
  
Anubis: Yeah. Now we don't have to worry 'bout him. I'll just take him down to the torture chamber.  
  
Kayura: Can I come?  
  
Anubis: ::says in a mischievous playful voice:: Sure, Kay-babe.  
  
Kayura: Never mind.  
  
Lori: Cut it out, Cale.  
  
Dais: ::dearmors:: What made him go berserk like that?  
  
Lori: I think I hit him a bit too hard over the head.  
  
Anubis: Hehe... well. I'm gonna go down and leave 'im there for a couple'a weeks. Teach him a lesson.  
  
Lori: Thank you.  
  
::next day, 4:00pm::  
  
Saph: Hey Lori!  
  
Lori: ::deeply involved in an experiment:: What?  
  
Saph: You have that date with Dais tonight. Shouldn't you be getting ready?  
  
Lori: I have 2 hours.  
  
Saph: Oh. Well, still don't you want to be properly presentable?  
  
Lori: Isn't a hour enough?  
  
Saph: No! I had mine at 6, started getting ready at 3:30 and I still wasn't ready when he came!  
  
Lori: That's because you are too slow. ::snaps fingers and appears in a blue skirt and sparkly blue sweater:: There! Done!  
  
Saph: That's nice. Now just make sure you don't get chemicals all over it.  
  
Lori: ::snaps fingers and appears in a plain outfit:: There. Now you should go check on Dais, not me.  
  
Saph: Fine. If you say! ::leaves lab to find Dais in his chamber looking nervous::  
  
Ya nervous?  
  
Dais: How do I look?  
  
Saph: Oh. You look great! Now about your nervousness...  
  
Dais: Like I said... Do I look nervous?? Yes. Happy now?  
  
Saph: ::mumbles:: Wow. You two are touchy today.  
  
Dais: Sure. Whatever. Just go away!  
  
Saph: Fine! I'm just trying to help!  
  
Dais: Help? How?  
  
Saph: Well, I understand this is your first date, correct?  
  
Dais: Yeess....  
  
Saph: Well, I've been on many dates, mostly with Anubis, but anyway, I just want to give you some tips.  
  
Dais: Like...?  
  
Saph: 1. Never make any rude noises at the dinner table. 2. Open the door for her every time! 3. Walk her back to her chamber and lastly 4. Don't talk a lot about yourself. Try to get to know her. Does that help?  
  
Dais: I know her. What else can we talk about?  
  
Saph: Well... How about her future career? How she wants to live?  
  
Dais: Future? Wait a minute... I have no real future.  
  
Saph: Yes, you do. I can see them now....  
  
Dais: Shut up!! As I was saying, my future is sitting in this castle the rest of my life until the world ends.  
  
Saph: That isn't what I see... I see pearly white wedding bells ringing on a summer's eve... ::sighs::  
  
Dais: SHUT THE HECK UP!!!  
  
Saph: Fine, fine, fine. Just though I'd set the mood for tonight. ::walks out and shuts the door behind her::  
  
Dais: Urgh.  
  
::with Anubis and Kayura::  
  
Anubis: So... whad'ya wanna do tonight?  
  
Kayura: I dunno. Whad you wanna do?  
  
Anubis: I dunno.  
  
Kayura: Wanna go for a walk around the castle grounds?  
  
Anubis: Sure.  
  
::with Sekhmet::  
  
Cale: Hey, Sekh! It's me, Cale. How about I get you outta that straight jacket and chains?  
  
Sekh: You touch me, you die.  
  
Cale: You don't want out? You like being here in the torture chambers?  
  
Sekh: You touch me, you die.  
  
Cale: Fine. But don't come running to me when they put you in that one room that has the spikes and it closes in on you.... Kay? Je ne!  
  
Sekh: Urgh.  
  
::6:00 is closing in fast::  
  
Saph: (5:40) Saph finally gets off the phone with Chi for an hour and a half to check on Lori. She goes outta the chamber to Lori's lab:: How's it goin'?  
  
Lori: ::looks, you could say, spectacular:: Why don't you ask Dais that?  
  
Saph: I don't know. But you look ...spectacular!  
  
Lori: So go check on him.  
  
Saph: I don't want to! He's your boyfriend!  
  
Lori: ::grits teeth:: One dinner is not considered a date. Therefore, he is not. Go check on him! ::holds up blue powerball:: Or else!  
  
Saph: AGH! Yeah! Sure, anything! What is that?  
  
Lori: Let me show you. ::heaves powerball at chair. It envelops the chair into a molten blue liquid::  
  
Saph: Uh-oh. Better go! Je ne! ::runs out of lab to find Dais. Soon, she opens the door to Dais's chamber:: Dais!? Ya here!?  
  
Dais: What do you want!?  
  
Saph: Lori wanted me to check up on you. You have like 5 min! Cause it's 5:55 right now! Isogu!!  
  
Dais: I'm ready... I'm ready...  
  
Saph: Good. ::grabs Dais's wrist and pulls him forcefully to Lori's lab:: Now don't forget what I told you... ::Saph leaves Dais to his fate with Lori. He knocks once. No answer. 2. No answer. 3. No answer. Finally, he walks in::  
  
Dais: Lori! You here!?  
  
Lori: ::craws out from under a desk and holds up an Erlenmeyer flask:: I'm here...  
  
Dais: What are you doing? We have a date to go on!  
  
Lori: Somehow, I think Dais wouldn't say that.  
  
Dais: Well, It's me. Just changed a little. Ii ja nai?  
  
Lori: I like the old Dais better. If you don't mind.  
  
Dais: Look, I'm sorry, but let's just get this over with, kay?  
  
Lori: No. ::snaps fingers and Dais appears to have two eyes but it's just an illusion::  
  
Dais: Well, then, are we going or not?  
  
Lori: Now we can. ::they go outside and leave::  
  
::fast forward and hour and a half later::  
  
::Dais and Lori come inside the castle. Dais has a black eye and cut on his chin. Lori looks exhausted::  
  
Dais: Why'd you do that? Now it hurts!  
  
Lori: Guess that waiter hit you over the head when you weren't looking. Don't you remember!?  
  
Dais: No... I was unconscious for 3 minutes.  
  
Lori: Well... First that waiter came by and said a rude remark so you jumped up and said something to him. He said no and you got in this big fight so I had to use all my energy to freeze time and brainwash everybody. YOU, on the other hand, continued beating on the waiter, so...  
  
Dais: And?  
  
Lori: I hit you in the chin.  
  
Dais: Oh. So that's why. Well, thanks for clearing that up for me.  
  
Lori: You're welcome.  
  
Dais: Well, I had a great time-- excluding the fight.  
  
Lori: Yay.  
  
Dais: I know. Well, see you around.  
  
Lori: Ha-ha.  
  
Dais: What's so funny?  
  
Lori: It's called sarcasm.  
  
Dais: Oh. Well, bye.  
  
::Later::  
  
Lori: I wonder... ::goes to Dais's chamber and opens door to back room. Somebody is tied on the floor:: Dais??  
  
Dais: ::muffled:: No, it's Elian Gonzalez. Of course it's Dais.  
  
Saph: ::Saph is somehow with Lori:: What happened? Who did this?  
  
Dais: Untie me and I'll tell you. ::Lori is already kneeling down to untie him:: It was Osiris.  
  
Saph: Why though? Why to you of all people?  
  
Dais: Lori, I think you know.  
  
Lori: ::nods:: Saph, if YOU don't know then don't bother.  
  
Saph: Then tell me, happened? Why did Osiris jump you?  
  
Dais: ::laughs dryly:: He didn't jump me. He simply froze me and tied me up.  
  
Saph: Oh.  
  
Lori: How long have you been here?  
  
Dais: Several hours maybe.  
  
Saph: So why did he do this?  
  
Dais: Can't you tell?  
  
Saph: He hates you?  
  
Dais: Not quite.  
  
Lori: So you can't tell, can you?  
  
Saph: No. Just tell me? Kudasai?  
  
Lori: He likes me.  
  
Saph: Oohh. Now I get it!  
  
Lori: Not that I like him. He's a freak, an idiot, and a show-off.  
  
Dais: I have to say I agree. Heartily.  
  
Lori: Hey Saph, you want to help me with this knot here? ::says to Dais:: He must have tied this 20 or 30 times.  
  
Saph: Sure. ::goes over to help Lori:: Man! This is on pretty tight!  
  
::with Saph's help, they finally finish untying Dais. He has rope burns all over his wrists, but ignores them as he stands up::  
  
Saph: That must hurt. Well anyway, how are we supposed to find this "Osiris" anyway?  
  
Dais: He's a shape shifter, but he can't hide injuries.  
  
Lori: So he can't hide his black eye.  
  
Saph: So... We look for a guy with a black eye?  
  
Lori: Basically. ::heads towards the door:: I'd be better if you stay here, Dais, in case he's still running around as you.  
  
Saph: Do you want me to stay with him?  
  
Lori: If you want.  
  
Saph: Kay. I will.  
  
::Lori really leaves::  
  
Saph: So. Whad'ya wanna do?  
  
Dais: Sit here and do nothing. That's what I always do.  
  
Saph: Kay.  
  
::with Anubis and Kayura on their walk, 3 hours later, still walking::  
  
Kayura: It's getting kinda chilly out. Wanna go in and warm up with some cocoa?  
  
Anubis: Ya.  
  
Kayura: Kay.  
  
Anubis: Kay then.  
  
Kayura: Why don't we visit Dais as well?  
  
Anubis: ::eyes go wide and then small again at the idea, then grins evilly:: Ya...  
  
Kayura: Good. Let's go then! ::she has a big grin on her face as she grabs Anubis's wrist and drags him to Dais's chamber::  
  
Anubis: ::he and Kayura burst in:: HIYA!  
  
Saph: AAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!! Oh ...it's only you guys. You scared the heck outta me and gave me a heart attack! Kami! Don't do that!  
  
Anubis: Sorry. Where's Dais?  
  
Saph: Uh ...last I saw him, he was hanging from the rafters... ::looks up::  
  
Dais: ::looks down:: What?  
  
Saph: See. Told ya, Anubis.  
  
Dais: What?  
  
Saph: Nofin. ::continues to look up:: Anubis was just wondering where you were. ::looks between Anubis and Dais::  
  
Anubis & Dais: What??  
  
Saph: NOTHIN! Nothin!  
  
Kayura: Saph, did you know that 'Nubis and I were an item?  
  
Saph: No. I don't care either.  
  
::Dais looks down, interested::  
  
Kayura: Ya sure? Him and I were just having a walk alone. Together. Just a while ago.  
  
Dais: Oh, really.  
  
Kayura: Yeah. Really. So where's your girlfriend, Dais?  
  
Dais: SHUT. UP.  
  
Kayura: So where's your boyfriend, Saph?  
  
Saph: He's at his place. Lounging.  
  
Kayura: Without you?  
  
Dais: Why do you care about other people's private lives?  
  
Kayura: I have no idea. But I think I smell a rat. Let's get outta here, 'Nubis-kun.  
  
Lori: ::bursts in:: I FOUND HIM!!! He's in the torture chamber.  
  
Saph: Really! Cool! Is he being tortured? Or is he torturing Sekhmet?  
  
Lori: Well if he's in the torture chamber, and doesn't know Sekhmet, WHAT DO YOU THINK?  
  
Saph: Yup. Gotta go. See ya! ::runs out of chamber for Dais's sake and to free Sekh::  
  
::Anubis looks up and watches Dais curiously::  
  
Dais: What? ::swings down from ceiling with some pain evident on his face::  
  
Anubis: ::he notices cuts on Dais's wrists:: What happened?  
  
::Dais tells story::  
  
Kayura: ::after story:: Like I said! Let's get outta here!  
  
Anubis: Fine. Oh, and Dais, put some iodine on those cuts. ::him and Kayura leave::  
  
Saph: ::from somewhere, she screams. It sounds like sharp pain:: AAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! LORI!! I THINK I NEED YOUR HELP!!  
  
Lori: ::orbs down:: What? What?  
  
Saph: I almost had him. I put my sword through his abdomen, but before I could put my spell on him, he slashes my arm. Don't ask how, he just did.  
  
Lori: So he's a conjurer, too. ::symbol glows silver and heals Saph:: Come on. Where did he go?  
  
Saph: He went upstairs. Towards the east wing.  
  
Lori: ::grabs Saph and takes her upstairs by orbing:: Cut him off at the pass.  
  
::Osiris comes up the stairs and Lori throws a blue energy ball at him. Saph pulls out her sword and gives the signal that he's paying more attention to her. Osiris runs at Lori. She conjures a sword and begins to fight Osiris. They are at the top of the stairs. Lori appears to be winning but with a sudden burst of energy, Osiris throws Lori the stairs. She cries out in pain, then yells to Saph::  
  
Lori: Finish him off!!!  
  
Saph: ::She raises her sword as she whispers a death spell. This time, first, she slices his neck all the way down then spears him in the abdomen (again):: That should finish him off. ::Osiris falls to the bottom of the stairs in a pool of crimson red blood::  
  
Lori: ::drags herself away from him:: OW!! I think I broke something!  
  
Saph: Need some help up?  
  
Lori: I don't know yet.  
  
::suddenly, everyone comes running. This 'everyone' is made up of Dais, Anubis, Cale, Sekhmet, (who's been freed) and Kayura::  
  
Saph: You missed it!  
  
Lori: Completly! Ow....  
  
Kayura: What happened?  
  
Cale: Are you okay?  
  
Anubis: Who's that?  
  
Sekhmet: What'd I miss?  
  
Dais: Are you alright?  
  
Saph: Dais, Cale: I'm fine, Lori is not. Anubis: That's Osiris. He's now dead. Sekh: You missed everything.  
  
Kayura: What happend???  
  
Dais: Isn't it obvious? Saph and Lori fought Osiris and, looking by the way Osiris looks, Saph killed him.  
  
Lori: You forgot about me. I was fighting him when he knocked me down the stairs.  
  
Saph: Yea. Dais, you might want to help her.  
  
::Dais turns red, then white, then normal colored, then heads down the stairs::  
  
Saph: Dais! Where are you going!? You're supposed to help your girlfriend!  
  
Dais: What are you, blind? That's where I'm going. ::suddenly, something pops inside his head:: Why is everybody here obsessed with boyfriend/girlfriend relationships? Why do you care? Why do you continually pester me about this? I could just kill you. I've had enough!!  
  
Saph: Look, I'm sorry. ::looks at minna and they nod in unison:: And so is everybody else. It's just that, well, it's a hard time for Anubis and I and I'm sure it's the same for Sekh, Kayura and Cale, too. Sekh barely ever sees Zoe, Kayura's with a previous Cheat-man, and Cale has to deal with the break-up of him and Althea. That leaves you, Dais. We all knew you kinda had this 'thing' for Lori, so we all decieded to finally get you two together. ::looks at everyone again and they nod in unison, again::  
  
Dais: Just shut up about it! Shut up! ::goes down and helps Lori up::  
  
Saph: Fine. I said you two are touchy today. I guess you really are!  
  
Lori: Shut up, Saph. ::she makes her way up the stairs with Dais's help::  
  
Anubis: It's not like he's touchy, Saph. He needs his space. He's tired of us bugging him all the time.  
  
Saph: Oh. Then what happend to Lori?  
  
Anubis: Nani??  
  
Saph: What happened? She's being touchy, too. Haven't you noticed?  
  
Anubis: Oh. Same thing. ::looks at Saph disapprovingly::  
  
Saph: Nani!? Not you too!  
  
Anubis: No. Let's all just leave them alone. For once.  
  
Saph: Do you think we went a little overboard with trying to get them together?  
  
Anubis: I'd say so.  
  
Saph: Kay.  
  
Anubis: Ya.  
  
Saph: Look, I'm sorry for everything that I did yesterday and I'm sure we can still be friends.  
  
Anubis: Actually, I should apologize. See... ::tell Saph the story about the unapproved chemical mixture::  
  
Saph: Oh. Well, that explains most of it. But still, you're with Kayura.  
  
Anubis: It wasn't my fault.  
  
Saph: Then, it has to be Kayura's.... ::looks at Kayura::  
  
Kayura: Heh...  
  
Saph: Well, if it wasn't Anubis's, then it has to be yours. Ne?  
  
Kayura: Yeah...  
  
Saph: So you admit it?  
  
Kayura: Uh-huh. Sorry..  
  
Saph: You can keep him. I have another.  
  
Kayura: Kewl! Let's go, 'Nubis!  
  
Saph: Je ne! Have fun!  
  
::Kayura & Anubis leave::  
  
Saph: So?  
  
Sekh: Well, I'm not having relationship problems, so I'll just sneak off....  
  
Saph: Kay. HOLD IT!! You're not going ANYWHERE until you clarify where you're going!! GOT IT!!??  
  
Sekh: I was going to... Zoe's....  
  
Saph: Then you're stayin' right here, Buster!!  
  
::Sekh runs away::  
  
Saph: There goes Sekh. Oh well. Cale, I'm done. How 'bout you? ::Dais comes back:: How's Lori?  
  
Dais: Why don't you go see? You're her friend, right?  
  
Saph: Kay. Where is she?  
  
Dais: Where would you be if you had a broken ankle?  
  
Saph: Hospital. Mortal Realm, that is.  
  
Dais: You're forgetting. We are not in the Mortal Realm. And anyway, she has healing powers.  
  
Saph: I know that.  
  
Dais: So...  
  
Saph: What room is she in? Her room, your room or her lab?  
  
Dais: WHY WOULD SHE BE IN MY ROOM???  
  
Saph: Because it's one of the most logical places to be.  
  
Dais: HOW IS IT LOGICAL??  
  
Saph: Because you're the one who helped her.  
  
Dais: SO THAT'S STILL NOT LOGICAL. She's in her room.  
  
Saph: Oh. Okay. Arigato! ::zips off::  
  
Dais: So are we done?  
  
Cale: I am. Are you?  
  
Dais: Dunno.  
  
Cale: Well I'm goin'. I guess that's the end. Je ne minna! ::leaves scene::  
  
Kayura: ::runs in:: WAIT!!  
  
Dais: What??  
  
Kayura: Oh. Never mind. Nofin' important.  
  
Dais: WHAT?? You interrupted for something. DON'T LEAVE OUR READERS HANGING!!  
  
Kayura: Well, we are!! ::grabs Dais:: See ya!  
  
Dais: AGH! ::gets dragged off screen wtih Kayura:: 


End file.
